How Taylor Swift turned statewide madness into a haunted pop anthem
Also featuring Florence Welch and… yes, probably a few bodies in the mangroves. The Intro: My Elmore Leonard Origin Story (ft. Taylor Swift)… Why intro? Cause I felt it added a bit of musical gravitas. So, intro it is… that’s about all I know of music. That and that there are things called chords, whatever those are.
Anyway, the first time I ever heard of Taylor Swift, she came to me not in a music video or teen magazine or whatever soft-focus place she was occupying at the time. No. She came to me in an Elmore Leonard novel. Specifically “Raylan” – the last big rodeo for that snarl-faced, bourbon-blooded U.S. Marshal with a Stetson and a bullet quota. Yes, that Raylan. The one Timothy made into a household name when “Justified” came out.
Midway through the book, there’s a poker scene. It’s set in a grimy Kentucky dive bar. A woman – stringy hair, fast mouth and absolutely no bluffing skills – slaps down a bad hand and says something like:
“I just love that Taylor Swift. Girl’s got pain in her voice.”
Wait, what? Leonard’s characters don’t do ironic. If they say something, they mean it. So I paused. Rewound. Taylor Swift? In a Leonard novel? It was akin to, I don’t know, re-reading “Blood Meridian” and coming up to a previously unheard quote by the judge pontificating on the holy merits of Coldplay.
You’re expecting maybe some Hank Williams, maybe Johnny Cash, at the very least the Stones. But not Taylor Swift.
So, I went and bootlegged a copy of her album, from a friend of mine. What friend? A biker. He had her last album and went, “Dude, that girl is strange… like Warren Jevon when he wrote “Excitable boy.” To which I scratched my head and said, “You’re comparing her to a guy who once wrote this medley “And he dug up her grave and built a cage with her bones?””
However, that book planted a seed. I started listening – not with radio ears, but with curiosity. Then came the heartbreak albums. “Folklore” and then “Evermore.” Then Dean in “Supernatural” listened to it. And then, more bikers had her stuff. Then it turned out everyone had a Taylor Swift song they jammed to.
And eventually, like Marc Maron said in his latest special: “I get it now.” Because Swift doesn’t just write songs. She builds mythologies. Weird, odd, strange linear notes in which you’re trying to figure out who she is flicking her finger off to right now. In other words, she crafts fables out of trauma.
And in “Florida!!!” she tapped into the deepest one of all. The American South’s sun-drenched confession booth. The crime drama and the madness.
“Florida!!!”- a haunted postcard from the swamp
Let’s start with the facts. Track 8 on “The Tortured Poets Department” album features Florence Welch (of Florence + The Machine) It sounds like Lana Del Rey walked into a crime documentary and decided to shot the host.
But the song is more than that. It’s a kaleidoscopic nightmare. A Bonnie and Clyde inspired dream about fleeing, about running from the wreckage and seeking absolution in the most American of traditions: Geographic redemption. In hitting the road so far that your only spot to dive into a new foxhole woudl be in Cuba.
“Florida!!!” isn’t about theme parks or flamingos or good vibes. It’s about escape. About heading to a place so lawless, so choked in sweat and swamp heat, that you just dissolve into the humidity and become someone else entirely.
The lyrics – broken women, beat raps and sunshine secrets
“I need to forget, so take me to Florida…”
Taylor isn’t sipping cocktails here. She’s on the lam. This is a woman crawling out of the wreckage of some great emotional catastrophe – and maybe, just maybe, a literal one too. Sounds like a breakup? Maybe. But it also sounds like the kind of whispering you hear from ghosts in abandoned motels off I-75.
And unlike other songs out there, she gets even. This is our modern day version of that Dixie Chick’s song “Earl’s Dead.” It’s is a murder ballad, not about a specific case, but of the fact that somehow, this state seems to draw them in. This is not just heartbreak, this is also incrimination.
It is a soundtrack for women who’ve helped bury the body, or faked the innocence or driven the getaway car – and now want to find salvation in a zip code with looser morals and lenient judges.
The real-life crime inspirations
In interviews, Swift mentioned being fascinated by true crime stories of women who move to Florida after scandal. Not just for a change of scenery, but because Florida is the national witness protection program for your past.
She was fascinated, hooked on podcasts on crime – think “Only Murders in the Building” but with tropical shirts – and a great deal of them occurred in Florida. Think about it. One of Netflix biggest documentaries, “Tiger King” with Joe Exotic, delved into murder and mayhem. And where does all this chaos take place? In a cat rescue thingamajig in Tampa, Florida.
Let that sink in. Need more receipts?
- Casey Anthony, post-trial, melted into Florida suburbia like butter on blacktop.
- Ellen Boehm (St. Louis, murdered her own children) hid in Florida for years.
- Dalia Dippolito, infamous for trying to hire a hitman on her husband, and smiling through it on TV? Palm Beach.
- Eileen Wuornos – America’s most famous female serial killer – operated out of Florida’s drink hole at truck stops and roadside motels, her whole life a scorched-earth version of the same song.
Oh and let’s not forget the fact that Jerry Dahmer also called this place his own. These are the stories that shape Florida’s emotional topography – and the song gets it. Not the crimes, per se. But the headspace they leave behind.
Statistically, actual stats, that Florida is one of the 3 states where criminals are most likely to hide. The other two? New Jersey and Ohio. There are actual Reddit posts about it. “What is the best US state to live as a fugitive“?
Florida as myth: America’s last emotional dumping ground
Taylor’s vision of Florida isn’t rooted in beaches. It’s rooted in the myth of reinvention. We’ve long been a nation of people fleeing west. But when you run out of west, you veer south. South to swamps that forget your name. South to cities built on wishful thinking and bad credit.
Florida is the final confessional. Where every mall cop, retired hitman, adult film producer and broken poet lands eventually. And where every girl who burned down the house and man who skipped bail ends up slathering sunscreen on sins that can’t be erased.
Florence + The Machine – angel of doom, backup vocals
Let’s not skip this. Florence Welch doesn’t do backup for just anyone. Her voice sounds like a siren from a Greek tragedy, or the ghost in the mirror telling you not to drive to Key Largo at 2 a.m.
She duets with Taylor like two women who survived something unspeakable. Or committed it. They’re not just singing. They’re surely testifying.
Florida – Taylor’s version
“Florida!!!” is not a vacation brochure. But rather, a true account of what to expect. It’s a breakup. And it’s a crime scene wrapped in neon and palm trees and hurricanes. It’s people hiding things in mangroves and, like Dexter, knowing that “the sea and swamp takes everything.” Welcome to Florida. We’ve got your alias ready. And the first drink’s on the house.
What do you think about Taylor Swift and “Florida!!!”? Let us know in the comments!